The Last Blog Post of Core!!

After perusing through my blog posts, I have learned that my ability and desire to analyze and understand texts has increased dramatically since beginning of Core in the Fall. I enjoyed looking at my blog posts and being able to see how I analyzed different parts of Adrienne Rich, and brought these ideas together in order to more fully understand her intentions for writing poetry, and why it was so difficult for her to truly express her inner emotions. Through looking at my Othello posts, I saw how my ability to analyze works has increased significantly from the level of analysis I exhibited in high school. In high school, I was wrapped up in who killed who, and who was mad at who, but in my blog posts, I explored deeper subjects and questions like "Where Othello's actions justified?", and Cassio's scheme of exploiting Othello's sense of trust. Core and the blogging system, has forced me to grapple with texts, often struggling more than I've wanted to, but it definitely completed its aim of expanding my knowledge and understanding of different ways in which thinkers and writers have interpreted human existence. Throughout my two semesters in Core, the blog has been most beneficial to me as a forum to organize my thoughts, so that I can better articulate them on the subjects that we cover in class. The blog has enhanced the quality of my contributions to classroom discussion as prior to class I have already given some thought to what I want to say. In addition to the benefits of blogging in class, I think that having basic knowledge of blogging will help me in my future as everything is going electronic and digital. Already, blogs are main outlets of expressing opinions on every subject big and small. Time will only increase the prevalence and importance of blogs. On a different subject, as I was looking through the course syllabus, under Shaping Lives, I read, "Our focus will be mainly on how individual human beings go about the business of fashioning lives that promise to be fulfilling." This statement made me think. Although we do talk about shaping lives, I'm not sure if I believed that Mrs. Curren and David are able to shape their lives in a way that promises to be fulfilling. I feel like they are still trying to shape their lives, and that they never achieve a "fulfilling" life. Just wanted to throw that out there. I've enjoyed blogging and core, but I hope I never have to read Freud or Nietzsche again, although I have realized their importance in a liberal arts education and life skills in general.

Political Activism in Persepolis

The family portrayed in Persepolis is very involved political demonstrations in Iran. Although they face issues we do not have to confront in the U.S., their level of commitment to their country despite the threat of violence is astounding. As I progress through Persepolis, I notice how the political involvement of the daughter has grown over time. When the conflicts in Iran initially arose, she was forced to stay at home while her parents attended the demonstrations, but since the spirit of revolution was in the air she was allowed greater privileges. On p.76, after learning of a meeting against fundamentalism, the little girls mother tells the girls father, "She should start learning to defend her rights as a woman right now!" This is a pretty bold statement. Her previously Conservative mother had now granted her daughter some degree of independence as well as a small entry point into the world of adulthood. As her opportunity arises to become involved in Iranian politics she takes full advantage. During the demonstration, she created fliers reading, "guns may shoot and knives may carve, but we won't wear your silly scarves!" As if this weren't enough, once she found that Iran was now in a state of war, she decided that she wanted to defend her country against the Arabs who kept attacking. When the Iraqi planes bombed Tehran, she even shouted, "those assholes". Throughout the story, this girl has really evolved as a political activist, and as a person as a whole. It has been fun to trace her development throughout the story.

An Adult message with a Childish Tone

Upon opening Persepolis, I was shocked. I though I had picked up the wrong book. There was no way we were reading a comic I though to myself. After I began the book, I was very pleased. I began to enjoy the pictures, and the lack of words. Once I got into the story, I realized that this book, is fascinating is that it speaks of adult subjects, and if a child read this book, most of the information would go over there head. How many children know about the Islamic revolution and oil in Persia. What I really liked is how the book progresses as a result of the author conveying the little girl's sense of confusion. For example, on p.32, the little girl speaks, "something escaped me. Cadaver, cancer, death, and murderer, laughter?" She does not understand why her parents are joking with a widow of cancer patient who was supposedly a martyr. To her this is not funny, as she is unaware how this man died. This confusion causes her to read until she eventually uncovers an important fundamental truth about why she feels shame and why the revolution is occurring. She answers this question with "the difference between social classes. Although she comes to this great conclusion, she immediately goes off on a tangent about her maid. This book is a little jumpy, but the constant change of scenery makes it unique and keeps the reader hooked.

Confusion in Evolution

Like many students during the final weeks of school, David is experiencing much confusion in his life. This confusion stems from moral, ethical, and even physical issues. Aware that his father has no clue as to the life he is leadeing, he decides to write to his Dad to inform him on his situation, and be a good son. The letter David has intended on writing to his father was going to contain a lie about his current situation in life. More interestingly, are the reasons why David feels he cannot write to his Dad. David writes, "I did not want to write to my father...it would have been too definitive an act. I knew which lie I was going to tell him and I knew which lie was going to work. I was not sure it would be a lie." (114) This last statement, about David not telling a lie has deep implications. The reader can speculate that David was going to tell his father that he had found a woman, and one day, possibly soon she and David would venture to the U.S. David's unwillingness to call this a lie respresents his progress in the quest for defining his sexual identity. It appears that he really wants to be with Hella. In his conversations with Giovanni this point becomes evident as well as the point that he is tired of living with Giovanni and all his emotional hardships. If David had actually evolved I'm sure his father would be glad to hear about him resting in heterosexuality. A letter from David, his only son, would surely offer him some much needed consolation.

Conventional Standards

Civilization, and the pressure its social norms apply on individuals who do not fit the typical stereotype, can be seen implitcitly in the letter David recieves from his father. David's father writes David about what he's been doing, why hasn't he returned home, with the ulterior motive of finding out what secret David has been keeping from him. David knew his father was living in a "pit of suspicions" (91). David also knew that his father was a conventional man. He had married and proceeded to have David with his wife, and he surely expected David to follow the same procedure. David was aware of the societal pressures that faced him in his quest to truly determine whether he wants to be with a man or a woman for the rest of his life. David is trying to find out who he is, and what his sexual preference/orientation is. Because of his predicament, David knew that his father hadn't asked one question. He failed to ask, "Is it a woman, David? Bring her on home. I don't care who she is. Bring her on home and I'll help you get set up." (91) David was fully aware why this question was not posed. David's father could not live with the fact that his son is gay. Having a gay son would not only be detestable by the social standards of the time, but would also represent the loss of hope in David's father, as he expected more out of David, his only son, all he has.

Shame

Dictionary.com defines shame: the painful feeling arising from the consciousness of something dishonorable, improper, ridiculous, etc., done by oneself or another:

During our lives, most of us have committed a shameful act, we have all felt dishonorable at one point in time. If you can't remember when you felt dishonorable, I know you can remember a time you felt ridiculous.

Unlike most Americans, the shame discussed between David and Jacques is a shame brought about by what some consider an improper sexual orientation. After Jacques describes his homosexual experiences, David is disturbed by the whole situation involving "men kneeling before you while you though of something else and pretended that nothing was happening down there in the dark between your legs" (56). Although David has had homosexual experiences, his were far more innocent.

This disturbing act Jacques describes makes David feel hopeless, and causes him to feel a sense of shame in those actions. Jacques takes the hint that David senses shame in his actions, and makes known the definition of shame. He speaks, shame occurs in these actions because "there is no affection in them, and no joy" (56).

This whole conservation of shame occurs for a greater reason. Ultimately, Jacques asks David shy he is ashamed about the love Giovanni feels towards him. Shame is not caused by homosexuality, but is the result of the uncertainly and lack of acceptance of homosexuality.

Homosexuality: A common theme throughout Core

In many of the texts we have read this semester, it seems that the theme of homosexuality has risen frequently. In Adrienne Rich, Sputnik Sweetheart, and now Giovanni's room homosexuality is present and even plays a role in the lives of the principle characters. After conversing about NY and Paris, Giovanni and David, thanks to the forwardness of Giovanni realize that they've become friends. Giovanni asks David, "Don't you know when you have made a friend?" (37). David responds to this offer of homosexuality is an open manner, and only questions his reaction after a stranger has the nerve to ask David, "You like him-the Barman" (39). Although David is relatively comfortable in his homosexuality, he responds to the stranger is a rash, defensive manner telling the stranger to get the hell away. In this situation, David only begins to feel uncomfortable once the perceptions of others are added into the equation. In the Sputnik Sweetheart, Sumire is comfortable with her desire for intimacy with Miu until she realizes that Miu does not feel the same way. The connections between Miu and Sumire, and Giovanni and David are strong until outside influences and the cloud of perfectness is destroyed. Miu and Sumire have a seemingly perfect relationship until Sumire realizes that Miu does not feel the same lesbian tendencies that she feels. Similarly, David is perfectly content with Giovanni until a complete stranger pokes fun at homosexuality. Because a theme is many of the books we've read this semester is homosexuality, we are able to make interesting connection between these books that enhance our understanding.

Aggression and its many forms

In doing a little googling, I was able to discover that human aggression because of intent can be classified in several different ways. Brainconnection.com gives three distinct types of aggression: (1) predatory aggression, which refers to stalking and killing of other species, (2) social aggression, which is unprovoked aggression that is directed an members of the same species for purposes of establishing dominance, and (3) defensive aggression, which refers to attacks delivered when an animal is cornered by a threatening aggressor.

It seems that the aggression Freud speaks of can be classified as social aggression. Freud refers to aggression as "the factor which disturbs our relations with our neighbor and which forces civilization into such a high expenditure of energy. (69) There is a ever-present hostility among all people and this stemming from aggression threatens to disturb our present civilized society. In addition to social aggression, Freud refers to aggression as an "instinctual passion" (69). By referring to instincts, aggression can be classified as defensive aggression as self-defense is a natural instinct of animals.

Freud goes deeper and considered the origin of aggressiveness, as he discussed private property. Distinct from popular belief, Freud asserts, "aggressiveness was not created by property. It reigned almost without limit in primitive times, when property was still very scanty" (71). In fact civilization imposes this aggressiveness. In many instances I have experienced this aggressiveness of civilization. Just think about how aggressive you when you were applying to college and were competing with thousands of other students. Most everyone instinctual probably occured in one manner or another. Similiar to Freud's times, aggressiveness still pervades all throughout society, now there are just rules that control aggressive displays and attempt to increase the burden of civilization among people.

Ignorance is Bliss according to Freud

"This contention holds that what we call our civilization is largely responsible for out misery, and that we should be much happier if we gave it up and returned to primitive conditions." (38)

Civilization makes us feel unhappy because "all the things with which we seek to protect ourselves against the threats that emanate from the sources of suffering are part of that very civilization" (38)

When I think of civilization, I think of school and getting a job. I think of responsibility as a source of misery, as it is a direct inhibitor of freedom. All the responsbility that we all have on a daily basis makes it hard for us to be happy. Instead of achieving true happiness, we often settle for simply forgetting our misery. Our responsibilities, products of civilization root us firmly in reality, and make true happiness truly unattainable. At school or work, we delight in the pleasure of our friends and colleagues, but there is always something on our mind. There is always some assignment or errand that needs to be completed. We are never finished, and this discomfort stemming from incompleteness limits our happiness level to be only at the point of possibly forgetting real misery, never at the point of experiencing pure joy.

The differing male and female perspectives on Comradeship

Today's social conventions are similar to those found in South Africa during the Apartheid. Women are not nearly as fond as men towards the killing of innocent human beings because they want to show loyalty and faithfulness to their fellow comrades. Bhecki's friend desires to kill for a reason the narrator as a woman does not understand. Mr. Thabane attempts to explain the concept to Mrs. Curren. After telling her she doesn't understand enough about comradeship, Mr. Thabane explains why the youth have violent tendencies. He writes, "When you are the body and soul in the struggle as these young people are, when you are prepared to lay down your lives for each other without quest, then a bond grows up that is stronger than any bond. That is comradeship." (149) Although Mr. Thabane doesn't agree with comradeship, he does acknowledgement that it is a part of the new, younger generation. Mrs. Curren still sees comradeship as "nothing but a mystique of death, of killing and dying, masquerading as what you call a bond" (150). Mrs. Curren even goes as far as blaming Mrs. Curren for not discouraging this comradeship. Even though Mrs. Curren is aware that her opinion counts for little or nothing she still expresses disdain for comradeship. Unlike her male counterpart who has the ability to recognize and live with comradeship, Mrs. Curren feels obligated to change ideals to what they once were.

Alcohol, the vehicle of epiphany

Recollecting upon the digital stories our core class constructed earlier this semester, I stumbled upon an epiphany realized by the narrator. Feeling as death was her only solution to escape the harsh reality of South Africa, the narrator, due to the consumption of alcohol, recognizes that her problem is not a "matter of life and death" (123), but instead the death of Florence's boy. Although the narrator is not a regular alcohol consumer, when the brandy was described to her a medicine, she took a sip. Although her gums "burned" (123), "something began to lift inside [her]: a curtain, a cloud" (123). After two sips, she sees the enlightening effects alcohol allows, and realizes why Mr. Vercueil drinks. Her consumption of alcohol allows her to shed "the veil of grayness" (123), and realize the truth. She is able to discover that her frail and desperate emotional state is a result of her viewing Florence's son dead, instead of fearing death. Alcohol soothes her anxious mind, and allows her thoughts to be settled and focused. Although she eventually consumes in excess, the alcohol appeals to her emotional senses as Bheki's death was up close and personal to her, and she had in the past only experienced blacks dying somewhere else.

The First Born

In Du Bois' "Souls of Black Folk", he dedicated an entire chapter to the passing of the first born. In this chapter Du Bois recognizes that even though slaves would grow to love their children, they do not fail to recognize that "within the veil" (170) their children are born. They know their children are Negros just like themselves, and are bound to face the same realities. For this reason, Du Bois said the death of the first born constitutes an "awful gladness" (173) in his heart, and his soul whispers, "not dead, not dead, but escaped; not bond, but free." (173) The first born will not have to grow up choked and deformed underneath the veil. Although unlikely, the first born is hoped to awaken without the influence of the veil. Unlike those that remain living, this deceased first born is not obliged to die in the bonds of slavery.

Acting Jewish

Upon reviewing for the mid-term, I found a passage speaking about acting "common" or "Jewish" (231). Rich tells that during her childhood, she was urged to not be a "too flamboyant" Jew. She distinguished that acting Jewish meant speaking loudly, dressing scantily, and possessing spontaneity. She felt she was acting Jewish if she "laughed too loudly or spoke aggressively" (231). These stereotypes as well as others are still very present today. Today, Jewish people are commonly associated with having big noses, and being very careful with their finances. The other day someone came in my room and told me a Jewish joke: Why do Jews play football? So they can get the quarter back". Although the joke is humorous, it illustrates how much some people like to criticize Jewish folks for no apparent reason. I have found that some people enjoy bashing people of the Jewish faith. If the stigma in the 1950's was similar to what they are today, it is apparent why Rich, her sister, and mother would make a conscious effort to conceal their Jewish association.

The Black Belt

The Black Belt, like the Sun Belt refers to a specific geoprahic location. In "The Souls of Black Folk", W.E.B. Du Bois gives greater meaning to this small blackbelt area in Georgia. About the blackbelt he writes, "how curious a land this,--how full of untold story, of tragedy and laughter, and the rich legacy of human life; shadowed with a tragic past, and big with future promise!" (100). Du Bois recognizes that this area in the South is still recovering from the hardships of slavery. Although there was left a rich legacy of human life, he writes in the chapter involving the wings of Atlanta that education of the negro is necessary, as the negro is not yet civilized. Du Bois does talk about future promise. Because he puts a positive and negative spin on everything, it is unsure what the future of the country will be. In saying that future promise exists, Du Bois recognizes the potential of the negro to adapt and become a member of modern civilization. This transition is not easy because most negros were not used to making their own decisions, and dealing with the resulting consequences. In a later part of the chapter he describes the blackbelt region as a "land of rapid contrasts and of cusiosly mingled hope and pain" (103). Hope and pain is mingled. He knows that for the negro to achieve both mental and physical freedom, there is going to be a long path with many obstacles. His faith in the Negro never fades either. After looking at the farmlands, Du Bois said he felt a comfortable feeling that the Negro is rising.

The Purpose of African American Education according to W.E.B. Du Bois

Even though Du Bois is calm in portraying his opinions to the reader, his opinions carry no less clout than the strong willed assertive Martin Luther King. Similar to King, Du Bois was a highly educated man, receiving a B.A. from Fisk University, and a second B.A., and an M.A. and Ph.D. from Harvard. Du Bois' high level of education adds legitimacy to his thoughts as many respect them, and show why he is such an ardent supporter of education. Du Bois dedicates a whole chapter of his book to "the wings of Atalanta" (63). He defines the wings of Atalanta as "the coming universities of the south" (71). Even further, Du Bois makes it known what he believes should be the primary function of the university. He writes, "the function of the university is... above all, to be the organ of that fine adjustment between real life and the growing knowledge of life, an adjustment which forms the secret of civilization." (70) According to this statement, Du Bois believes black people are not yet civilized. They need to be taught what to do, how to act. They need to mold themselves into civilized beings, and Du Bois thinks that the university is the right tool to aid them in this transition. Later on, as Du Bois speaks of training the black man, he further elaborates on the purpose of higher training schools. He writes that the aim of these institutions is to "furnish the black world with adequate standards of human culture and lofty ideals of life" (81). Du Bois posed a difficult task of high education. Today, the expectations from higher education differ drastically to what occured during the time when the slaves were emancipated.

Foreshadowing: The Ferris Wheel Scene

During the ferris wheel scene, the author does a commendable job in tricking the reader through his cunning use of foreshadowing. As Miu approaches the Ferris Wheel, she thinks, "It would be fun to see my apartment from the Ferris Wheel, she suddenly thought, instead of the other way around" (148). At this point, my mind began to jump to conclusions. I became to think that she would peer into her apartment to find someone occupying it. Maybe she would see a burglary, or maybe her father had made a surprise visit. Just as I make this prediction, Murakami brings a seemingly drunken ferris wheel operator into the scene who locks the red gondola "from the outside" (149). At this point, my mind jumped in another direction. I knew she was going to be locked in, but I had an idea whether she would become stuck in the gondola overnight by herself, or if the operator planned to give her a ride from hell. Murakami foreshadowing in a manner that keeps the reader in the dark; he sheds no light upon the outcome until it actually occurs. As I continued to read, both of my suspicions proved correct. Someone was in Miu apartment, or so she thought. (as she saw herself, or at least half herself in her apartment) Miu was always locked in the gondola. I found this instance of foreshadowing interesting because it did not give the reader concrete information, but Murakami does provide the reader with enough information to make informed speculations about what will occur.

Flying First Class

Although the phrase Flying first class generally means experiencing luxury and contentment while on a plane ride, I could not help but notice how Murakami throws this phrase around. Murakami uses this phrase on two separte occasions, once in its traditional sense, and another in a sensational sense. Murakami mentions this phrase as Miu is talking to K trying to convey the necessity that he needs to make a trip to Greece as Sumire "would want [him] to come here" (80). During this conversation, Miu makes its clear that she will cover K's traveling expenses. She tells him, "Just come. The sooner the better. Just buy a ticket. First Class, whatever you like." (80) Here Murakami uses this phrase in the traditional sense. In a previous scene, Murakami uses this phrase in a more sensual, almost perverted manner. He uses this phrase to refer to K's sex life with older married women. Speaking of an older, but still attractive women he slept with, K writes about the woman, "She knew all my desires, everything I wanted and everything I didn't want. She knew just how far to go and when to stop-in bed and out. Made me feel like I was flying first class" (77). From his usage of this phrase of this situation as well as the other scenes, notably the scene with Miu and Sumire in the bed, it occurs to me that Murakami is somewhat pervert. Maybe, the author was simply trying to give the reader some insight into the deeper character of K, but using the first class methaphor to speak of K's sexual relationships is in the proper context, but doesn't neccesarily add to the overall quality of the story.

Talking to the Dead

Amidst the confusion of Rich's poem "Sources", I was able to interpret a small portion of her poem which seems to give some insight as to who Rich is speaking to in this poem as well as her view on the idea of talking to the dead. On p.113, section XXII,Rich makes it clear that she is talking to someone other than her father as she states, "it's been different with my father:he and I always had a kind of rhetoric going with each other, a battle between us, it didn't matter if one of us was dead or alive" (113). Not only does this excerpt serve to clarify who Rich isn't speaking to, but it also tells the reader that Rich believes communication with the dead is indeed a possibility. She believes that writers can either speak about or directly to the dead. For her personal purposes she tells that she often has to speak to the dead. Beside from her own intentions, Rich writes how she hates the living writer because they are terrible "projectionists" (113), and she doesn't like the way they "use the dead" (113). Although it seeems Rich is using the dead in some fashion to converse about her suffering due to being a Jew, and not "giving herself away", Rich fails to clarify the reader with any other purpose for this talking to the dead. I am unclear the significance the dead are far as being part of a source. It seems Rich talks to the dead to avoid feeling alone so the dead can be possibly considered a source of company, encouragement, and support.

Understanding Planetarium based on Info in other Essays

Upon my first reading of this poem, I was confused as to whom the woman in the poem respresented. I asked myself, is Adrienne Rich speaking of herself, or is she speaking of Caroline Herschel, a superb astronomer in her own right. Based on the stanza, "a women 'in the snow among the Clocks and instruments or measuring the ground with poles" (38), I though Rich was speaking of Herschel. Rich, herself is not physically using instuments to observe astronomy, but this may be some sort of a metaphor about the discovery of something unexpected in her life. In a later stanza, it seems that Rich is talking about herself in this poem. She writes, "I have been standing all my life in the direct path of a battery of signals the most accurately transmitted most untranslatable language in the universe" (39). From this stanza, with the use of the personal "I", it seems Rich is talking about herself, and possibly her inability to understand certain details of her life. After reading Rich's essay "When We Dead Awaken: Writing as Re-Vision", the poem "Planetarium" is the companion poem to "Orion". Interestingly enough, the poem "Orion" reconnects Rich with part of herself, she feels like she's losing her energetic imagination. She uses "cold and egotistical" (175) to apply to herself. With this in mind, she gives some background about "Planetarium". She writes that "Planetarium" is a companion poem to "Orion" written three years later. More importantly she writes, "the woman in the poem and the woman writing the poem become the same person" (175). The poem was written after visiting a real planetarium and reading an account of the work of Caroline Herschel, an astronmer. With these detailed, knowing Rich is speaking of herself in the "Planetarium", we can conclude that she sees her body as an instrument with a purpose. She also mentions that her ultimate goal is relieving the body and reconstructing the mind. Knowing Rich is writing about herself in this poem not only gives us insight into her personal problems, but it also gives the reader more legitimacy in assuming that some of her other more personal stories are about herself as well.

Iago the Diablo! A "Special" piece of the plot!

The majority of people who read "Othello" view Iago as the antagonist of a majority of the characters in this work. Throughout the work, his demoralizations are personal and persistent. He has no problem subordinating his wife, using her a means to achieve his ultimate goal (hankerchief scenario). When Cassio is injured, Iago has no problem calling Biana "a strumpet" (125), and blaming her for Cassio's unfavorable situation.
Iago's actions as well as his words reflect his ill will. When he is not busy demoralizing women, he manages to find time to betray his most promient client as well as spark suspicion in Othello's trustworthy, innocent mind. Being a "devil", or at least from "evil", he effectively uses the natural condition of darkness to accomplish his villainous plot. Himself armed with the only light, Iago uses the darkness to betray Roderigo, betray Cassio, and befriend Cassio all at his own convenience.
While Iago's genious seems to be infinite, like all bad people, he eventually falls. While Othello is one of Iago's greatest pawns, he is also the angriest pawn once he discovers Iago's ill intent. Upon Othello's discovery, that Cassio and Desdemona never eloped, and he had killed an innocent Desdemona, Othello searches for answers. Although Iago's plot seems spoiled at this point in time, he still defends his actions stating, "I told him what I thought, and told no more than what he found himself was apt and true" (136). Even after causing an unnecessary death, Iago is still reluctant to take responsilbity of his actions. As the reader, I was thrilled to hear that Othello had ran at Iago, and Iago was eventually taken captive. I felt like the book was complete at this moment. In my eyes, it was unnecessary for anyone else to die in order for the book to be complete. Once the reign of the "notorius villain" (139) came to a halt, I began to lose interset in the remainder of the story. Because Iago is a diablo, his role as a perpetrator of evil, keeps the story interesting, and actally establishes the plot in many cases. Once his role as the devil ceases to exist, the story is devoid of a fundamental element, conflict. As much as the reader hates Iago's character, most love the role he plays in the overall story and the conflict he creates between a myriad of characters.

Are Othello's actions justified?

While Lodovico and Gratiano view Othello as a villain, one can confer that Othello's actions were those of an honest, but enraged gentleman, the heat of the moment. While speaking to Lodovico after the death of Desdemona, he says, "an honorable murderer, if you will; for nought I did in hate but all in honor" (142). I believe many readers would believe Othello would not kill Desdemona unless he was thoroughly convinced she had cheated on him. Othello's conversation with Emilia revealed that Othello honestly believed "Cassio did top her[Desdemona]" (134). Othello also gave Desdemona the option to repent her sins before her death, as he did not want to kill her soul, just her body. His final decision to smother her can be reflected in the fact that he was enraged in the heat of the moment. As they exchange their last words, Desdemona "weep'st" for Cassio to "my [Othello's] face" (131). His hatred of Cassio, rather than his hatred of Desdemona may have been a more significant reason for him to actually begin the smothering. At the time of the smothering, Othello truly believed Desdemona's death was justified. After Othello finds out that Cassio and Desdemona never had sexual relations, he was enraged at Desdemona's unnecessary death as a direct result of Iago's villanious plan. These emotions eventually lead him to stab Iago and kill himself. While some readers may not believe Othello was justified in his actions, at the time of the smothering, Othello did in fact feel justified in his actions.

Cassio: an honest, faithful servant w/o a Reputation

As I read "Othello", Cassio was the character that I felt like I knew the best, as well as the character that truly was a gentleman. Despite Cassio's unfortunate drinking habit, Cassio is a man of honesty and admiralty. In his dealings with Othello, aside from the drunken incident, he is professional and sincere. While waiting for Othello's ship to return to Cyprus, he speaks to the lord, "please give him [Othello] defense against the elements, for I have lost him on a dangerous sea!" (33).
Cassio's gentlemanly habits are exemplified in the mannerly way he greets Emilia, and in his attempts to calm the emotions of Desdemona and Emilia as they are insulted by Cassio. Because Iago is such a gentleman it is tough to see him lose his position over his love of the spirits [alcohol]. After telling Othello that with "his personal eye, will he look" (45) to the guard, he fails to complete his promise to Othello.
Unable to uncover Iago's plot of evil, Cassio becomes the victim of Iago's conspiracy. Cassio reluctantly accepts a drink, which ultimately leads to him chasing Roderigo and stabbing Montano. After being condemned by Othello, he loses his post as an officer for Othello. This event has a significant impact upon Cassio as he had always been a faithful servant. He speaks to Iago, "O, I have lost my reputation! I have lost the immortal part of myself, and what remains is bestial" (55). Cassio, a good natured loving servant loses his livelihood as a result of this incident.
Although many may not consider Bill Clinton as honest as Cassio, Bill's situation was similar to that of Cassio during the last days in which he occupied the White House. After his affair with Monica went public, and Bill evacuated his position as president, he had experienced a loss of reputation similar to that which Cassio felt. Although Bill was a servant of the U.S. loved by many, lust, not alcohol as in Cassio's case, caused him to lose his position of office that he loved very much. Despite the lack of a villainous plan, Bill Clinton probably still felt "past all surgery" (55) as did Cassio.

The Motive of Revenge

The motive of revenge is present in many of Cassio's actions. His revenge is primarily directed towards Othello, as he and Othello are not on good terms because Othello promoted Cassio instaed of himself to the level of Lieutenant. This idea of revenge is also present in his second soliloquy. Here he concocts his master plan to get even with Othello for allegedly sleeping with his wife. His plan involves pouring "pestilence into [Othello's] ears" (Shakespeare 58). To make Othello jealous, he has decided to turn the "virtue" of Desdemona into "pitch" (Shakespeare 58). The anger Cassion feels as a result of Othello reluctance to put him in a position of authority is similar to the feeling many college seniors feel when they don't get offered a job. Unlike Cassio, real moral people rarely concoct devilish plans to get revenge with their prospective employers. Times have changed, instead of fighting, most people today tend to use rejection as a motivator to try harder and do a better job the next go around. With the increases in societal civilty over time, people have shifted their instincts from revenge to trial and error.

Creating an Audio track

This week my goal has been to get my audio for my digital story finished. At night I have been spending time in the TLC to accomplish this goal. Audio was not as easy as I though it would be. It took a lot of editing just to get the story right. After this I laid down the background tracks and sounds. This part I found more enjoyable. I really like garageband now, and have a new respect for Macs. The room in the TLC that I have been using is soundproof so it was easier to make recordings without getting interrupted. All the technology staff has been very supportive making this experience less intense. I still have to determine exactly where I want to put my pictures. I have had great success with picnik in editing my pictures.

Digital Story Progess

Today I went to the TLC and did a recording of my script. After listening to myself reading it through, I realized that I needed to make it more interesting and less monotone. I realized it was important for me to change the dynamic level of my voice. As I was playing around with garage band for an hour or so, I realized to get the audio track I desired I would probably have to spend a great amount of time in front of the mac. Although creating an interesting audio track is tedious, it has been fun to play around with this new software. I am glad I have some time to complete this project because I'm sure after I add pictures, I am going to want to play with my audio track.

The Significance of Music

I thought it was especially interesting that during Augustine's explanation concerning his reception into the church, he mentioned the importance of music in the realm of a church service. Augustine writes, when he began attending church, "It was the time that the practice was instituted of singing hymns and psalms after the manner of the Eastern churches, to keep the people from being altogether worn out with anxiety and want of sleep" (173). Being a pretty regular churchgoer, I see where Augustine is coming from when he writes that hymns aid people in not falling asleep during the droll of a pastor in a one hour long service. My pastor in Urbanna posseses this droll to a great extent. In our services, we rely on the choir not only to keep us awake, but to give us motivation to pay attention and focus on the rest of the service. Although my upcoming statement may only be an assumption, it seems to me that the gift of music has aided immensely in the spirituality of many people of all religions as it triggers alertness and the ability to become involved in the contents of the service.

People love Lost Sheep

Even in Augustine's day, lost sheep were the recipients of much praise, or at least more so than those who are "normal". Augustine writes, "O loving God, what is it in men that makes them rejoice more for the salvation of a soul that was despaired of or one delivered from a major peril, than if there had always been hope or the peril had been less" (145). This concept of praising the lost sheep is still seen today. For example look at the NFL. When the Patriots beat San Diego to advance to the super bowl, they received less praise than did the Giants who struggled to pass Green Bay. Everyone knew the Patriots would be super bowl contenders, but there were a larger number of skeptics concerning the success of the Giants. Despite the Patriots record breaking season, the Giants received more praise for their win because it was an upset. Augustine writes, "Greater joy is heralded by greater pain". This statement still rings true today because man likes to watch others succeed after encountering significant opposition, not easily on their first try.

Temptation

In Augustine's confessions he speaks of many past temptations. He speaks of the temptations involved in stealing from the pear tree and well as the temptation of adultery. He makes pretty solid argument explaining that temptation cannot be wholly avoided. Concerning the issue of women, he writes, "He that is without a wife is solicitous for the things that belong to the Lord, how he may please God: but he that is with a wife is solicitous for the things of the world, how he may please his wife" (26). In economic terms, man's wants are insatiable. Man has to chose what he wants. Does he want a wife or does he want to be a model Christian. Whichever option he chooses, temptation will be present and cause him to want the other. He has no way no get all he desires and man is stuck in the trap of temptation. Life is about choices and the consequences that result according to the choices you make. Everyone has to deal with the consequences of this choices.

Our Time on Earth

As a Christian, I am taught to view my humanly existence as a vehicle for obtaining eternal salvation. The Bible teaches that Christians establish their faith during their time on Earth, and make known that they want their lives to be dominanted by the quest for salvation. In a Christian life, all actions reflect goodwill and the presence of God. Augustine causes me to closely examine my faith as he writes, "I know not where I came from, when I came into this life-in-death or should I call it death-in-life" (6). Most Christians would agree that the mortal existence is merely an obstacle to achieve an eternal life in death. Therefore are human existence is death in life, we are simply fulfilling an obligation. Despite the correctness of this statement, I also believe that most people try to make the most of their human existence whether that means having the most fun or making the most fun. It is hard to be completely true to the goal of eternal salvation, but is a necessary part of Christian ideology.